So, I am probably, like the last person on earth to have read
the book Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother
by Amy Chua. Well, let me not be soooo hard on myself. I actually read it a
year ago, and I really enjoyed the book. Although at the end of the book, in
her hindsight, she might have done some things differently; I not only applaud
her in her ethics, but I have also instilled a lot of her tactics into my own
household. Now I am not saying that everything
she did was correct-not for my family, rather taking a look at what I was and
was not doing is what I gained most from her book.
For example; over the summer I choose to use some of the new
resources I learned from her book by drilling
words with my four year old every day. I took all his toys away, and put them
in the garage. He was able to earn a few of them back every day when he learned
the words (4-7 words) of the day. We did this for most of the summer, and when
we were done, my son new approximately 40 words and could read the book Go Dog Go by Dr. Seuss.
In one section of the book, her youngest daughter is playing
tennis. She hadn’t been playing long, but apparently her lessons were going well.
Her instructor gave Amy Chua, very glowing reviews about her daughters’ determination,
loyalty and attitude to complete a task, and better herself. Amy Chua asked her daughter about it, and she
said she was just using the technics Amy taught her (or put her through) when
she played the violin.
Now I don’t know about you, but what that says to me, was
that she learned a skill that she could apply to any area of her life, to help
her succeed. Could that have been achieved in a different way, most certainly!
Nonetheless, her method did work. I think we also forget that the time a child
is putting into all of this, so is the mom. There were a lot of things she
could have done with her time, besides sitting down practicing, whatever, with
her children.
What I recognized, from reading Amy Chua’s book, was that I
was not spending enough time with my child in educating him. I am his mother, I
am his first teacher, and if he is going to be pushed it should be by me. Speaking
of being pushed, I also learned that all kids are not the same, and sometimes
pushing is exactly what that child may need.
If you haven’t read the book, I implore to read it. Don’t
focus so much on what you think she did wrong; rather focus on what tools you
can learn from her methods, and how you can implement them into your household.
I know that will be hard to do. We as human beings are so
judgmental. Give it a try. You might just come away with some great tools your
child can use for the rest of their lives.
Okay everybody! When I read that statement, I had a hard time applying that mentality to every situation. For instance, if I am broke, and have no gas money; well, am I mad at myself, or at the situation? For me personally, it would depend on how I became broke. If I spent my last $10.00 on donuts and eyeshadow, then yes, I am very mad at myself for spending so unwisely. However, if I am broke because I have no job and am going through a divorce....well, not so sure I am going to be mad at myself,; I am more likely to be very angry at the situation.
